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   Football Italia Forum » Gwan bwoy, mek mi laff! Page Previous  1, 2, 3 ... , 9, 10, 11  Next 
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kaka22
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Milan, 1860 Munich, Inverurie Locos

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Post 19-04-12 12:07
Can you spot Didier Drogba?

웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 o-|-< 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃 웃웃

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Post 02-05-12 12:36
Courtesy of the Guardian's Fiver, I present the Samuel L. Jackson (Pulp Fiction era) alpaca:

Luftwaffles
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Juventus, Cruzeiro, Athletic Bilbao

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Post 30-06-13 17:08
I















In a London nursing home an old priest lay dying.

For years he had faithfully served the people of the nations capital.

He motioned for his nurse to come near.
Yes, Father? said the nurse.
I would really like to see David Cameron and Nick Clegg before I die?,whispered the priest.
Ill see what I can do, Father, replied the nurse.

The nurse sent the request to No 10 and waited for a response.
Soon the word arrived; David and Nick would be delighted to visit the priest.

As they went to the hospital, David commented to Nick,I dont know why the
old priest wants to see us, but it certainly will help our images.
Nick agreed that it was the right thing to do at this time.
When they arrived at the priests room, the priest took Davids hand in
his right hand and the Nicks hand in his left.
There was silence and a look of serenity on the old priests face.

The old priest slowly said: I have always tried to pattern my life after our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ.

Amen, said David

Amen, said Nick

The old priest continued, Jesus died between two lying, thieving, bastards; and I would like to do the same !!!











































I

Lupo Pazzesco
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Post 30-06-13 20:30
 Thanks for that.
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Luftwaffles
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Post 27-08-13 13:24
-----











A bloke starts his new job at the zoo and is given three tasks. First Is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds.

As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show who is Boss, he beats it to death with a spade.

Realizing his employer won't be best pleased he disposes of the fish by Feeding it to the lions, as lions will eat anything.

Moving on to the second job of clearing out the Chimp house, he is Attacked by the chimps who pelt him with coconuts.

He swipes at two chimps with a spade killing them both.. What can he do? Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because Lions eat anything...

He hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.

He moves on to the last job which is to collect honey from the South American bees.

As soon as he starts he is attacked by the bees. He grabs the spade and Smashes the bees to a pulp.

By now he knows what to do and shovels them into the lions cage because Lions eat anything.

Later that day a new lion arrives at the zoo. He wanders up to another lion and says "What's the food like here?"

The lions say: "Absolutely brilliant, today we had Fish and Chimps with Mushy Bees

Curva Fiesole
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Fiorentina, Manchester United, Cheltenham Town, Gloucester RFC

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Post 27-08-13 15:23
The elderly Italian man went to his parish priest and asked if the priest would hear his confession.

"Of course, my son," said the priest.

"Well, Father, at the beginning of World War Two, a beautiful woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans; I hid her in my attic, and they never found her."

"That's a wonderful thing, my son, and nothing that you need to confess," said the priest.

"It's worse, Father; I was weak, and told her that she had to pay for rent of the attic with her sexual favors," continued the old man.

"Well, it was a very difficult time, and you took a large risk - you would have suffered terribly at their hands if the Germans had found you hiding her; I know that God, in his wisdom and mercy, will balance the good and the evil, and judge you kindly," said the priest.

"Thanks, Father," said the old man. "That's a load off of my mind. Can I ask another question?"

"Of course, my son," said the priest.

The old man asked, "Do I need to tell her that the war is over?"

Lupo Pazzesco
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Post 29-08-13 12:24
   
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AS Roma > Drugs & winning at all costs.

kaka22
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Posts: 252
Milan, 1860 Munich, Inverurie Locos

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Post 30-08-13 16:42
A Milan fan walks into a bar in Barcelona, and the barman says 'usual mate'.

Lupo Pazzesco
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Post 30-08-13 16:54
Topical & it it brought a smile to these old chops.
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Curva Fiesole
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Post 04-09-13 17:39
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/23963416                                                  

Dave
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Post 04-09-13 20:26
Those of a certain vintage will remember the phrase: 'David Icke? Off his bike'. It's pleasing to see that Greg Dyke has so considerately ensured that an updated version of this phrase can be used until at least 2022 (I say at least on the off chance that a miracle occurs and England win it - possibly by dint of a host of nations refusing to b*gger up their season to accommodate the Qataris...

Dels
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Post 04-09-13 22:43
Curva Fiesole wrote:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/23963416


I was going to post that in the GTTMUH thread.

Dels
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Post 08-08-14 22:42
Oscar Pistorius has sacked his legal team to hire Celtic's legal team because they lost two legs but still won.

blackandblue
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Inter, West Ham

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Post 09-01-15 23:31
As Farmer Browns train pulled out of the station at 10:00am traveling east at 50 mph, he had no idea that at that very same moment Farmer Green was 100 miles away on a west-bound train heading straight for him at 60mph and that because of a tragic track-switching mistake he was going to die in a fiery head-on train crash at exactly uhm well err sometime later that day.

Myles
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Post 10-01-15 00:53
That sounds like an answer given in school test.

Liam
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Post 27-05-15 18:48
Fifa.

Whether it belongs in this thread I don't know, but I'm way past the point of being outraged and have decided the only way to react to this ongoing farce is to laugh.
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Myles
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Post 27-05-15 22:10
FIFA  

Dels
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Post 27-05-15 23:09
And it still won't bring down the Teflon Don.

Duncan!
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Italia, Roma

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Post 28-05-15 04:35
They got the flunkies from the Americas hoping they will squeal more dirt.

Dels
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Post 16-08-15 20:13
The delusional one

Quote:
 "It is a fake result. We were the best team by far in the second half. What they did in the first we did in the second.

"We dominated and when they feel they are in trouble, and they felt, they changed Aguero and Sterling, they try to recover control of the game is exactly when they scored the second goal. For me, completely fake.

"Their goalkeeper was good and we couldn't score. They were only coming up with long balls and even that we controlled that. Not one single problem in the second half, they had lots."


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   Football Italia Forum » Gwan bwoy, mek mi laff! Page Previous  1, 2, 3 ... , 9, 10, 11  Next 
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